Tuesday, March 15, 2011

It's in the stars ...

"When it is the darkest, you can see the stars." ~ Charles Beard

I am often surprised by my reaction lately.  It is almost as if Bill's death has clarified the importance of placing appropriate value on what needs attention or not.

I was sharing with a young woman who has lost her mother recently, and she was just coming to the same conclusion.  There was an event that would have, only a few short months ago, sent her in a flurry of discussions and action; in the end,  she would have probably carried the load.   Fast forward a few months and she came to the conclusion that in the bigger picture it was not worth the frenzy for it would not change the circumstances.  I think this is where the expression, "There are more important things in life ..." came from.

I think back on how I used to get all worked up about "stuff" and events, good and bad, over which I had no control.  Poor Bill!  And I used to tease him about his "soap box" ranting!  I think back now and realize that he may have been standing on a "Tide" box but I was right up there with him on my "Sunlight" box.  We simply did not go on about the same things.

These are definitely my darkest days.  Life without Bill quite simply put, "sucks".   Given that grieving takes so much energy, I am now constantly weighing the importance of things as they come up.  There really isn't much out there that would have me lose sight of my stars ~ God, Family and Friends!  Without these relationships, these days would have no light.

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